Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Mischievous Saarthak should be in third grade...

The female teacher was having continuous trouble with Mischievous Saarthak, so, one fine day, she asked, "Saarthak, what is your problem, sonny...?"

Saarthak answered, "I'm too smart for the Kinder Garten... In my locality I play with some elder kids, and I'm really smarter than they are... So, I think I should be in the third-grade, at least...!"

The teacher had had enough, so, she took Saarthak to the principal's office, and made him wait outside the office, while she explained to the principal what the situation was...

The principal told the teacher that he would give Saarthak a test and if he failed to answer any of his questions, he was to go back to the Kinder Garten and behave...

The teacher readily agreed to this, Saarthak was brought in, the conditions were explained to him, and he agreed to take the test...

Principal started asking questions, "What is 3x3, Saarthak...?"

Saarthak replied, "9, sir..."

"What is 6x6...?"

"36, sir..."

And so it went with every question the principal thought a third-grader should know...

After 10-12 questions, the principal looks at the teacher and tells her, "I think Saarthak can go to the third-grade..."

The teacher still looked adamant, and said, "I have some of my own questions... Can I ask him...?"

Both the principal and Saarthak agreed...

Teacher asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of...?"

Saarthak, after a moment, replied, "Legs, Ma'am..."

Teacher threw the next queston, "What is that you have in your pants but I do not...?"

Saarthak replied immediately, "Pockets, Ma'am..."

"What starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval-shaped, delicious and contains thin whitish liquid...?"

"Coconut, Ma'am..."

"What goes in hard and pink and then comes out soft and sticky...?"

The principal's eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the answer, Saarthak replied, "Bubblegum, Ma'am..."

"What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs...?"

"Shake hands, Ma'am..."

"Now, I will ask some "Who am I" sort of questions, okay...?"

"Yes, Ma'am..."

"You stick your pole inside me... You tie me down to get me up... I get wet before you do..."

"Tent, Ma'am..."

"A finger goes in me... You fiddle with me when you're bored... The best man always has me first..."

The Principal was looking restless, a bit tensed, but Saarthak replied in a calm tone, "Wedding Ring, Ma'am..."

"I come in many sizes... When I'm not well, I drip... When you blow me, you feel good..."

"Nose, Ma'am..."

I have a stiff shaft... My tip penetrates... I come with a quiver..."

"Arrow, Ma'am..."

What word starts with an 'F' and ends in a 'K' that means a lot of heat and excitement...?"

"Firetruck, Ma'am..."

"What word starts with an 'F' and ends in a 'K' & if you don't get it, you have to use your hand..."

"Fork, Ma'am..."

"What is it that all men have one of... It's longer on some men than on others, the pope doesn't use his and a man gives it to his wife after they're married...?"

"Surname, Ma'am..."

"What part of the man has no bone but has muscles, has lots of veins, likes pumping, and is responsible for making love...?"

"Heart, Ma'am..."

The teacher stopped ultimately with a helpless look on her face...

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and said to the teacher, "Send Saarthak to Delhi University, I got the last ten questions wrong myself..."

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